Monday, November 20, 2006

For the past few months, I've been having a hard time dragging my butt to practice as I'm sure is obvious from my attendance. I tried to keep telling myself that it would all be different when I could scrimmage and when I got assigned to a team. However, I finally had to realize that I just wasn't having fun anymore, and why should I force myself to keep doing something that I don't enjoy? Then again, I argued with myself that I was so close to passing level 1 so I shouldn't give up. However, not doing anything and quitting are the same thing. I haven't been to practice since the Oct 14th assessment, and it's just time to throw in the towel.

I wasn't planning on quitting. Ever. It just sort of happened. Andrew & I have season tickets for the Hurricanes and that takes up a lot of evenings. Then, my ferret Eomer got sick in October, and we couldn't leave him for long for about 3 weeks...and we didn't want to either. Plus, I really love getting off work and just going home, and I've really missed doing so all these months. In general, I'm just not wanting to invest the time in derby anymore. I feel like I never see my husband or my parents or my friends enough. And, I have to be honest that it was terribly disappointing to not pass level one on Oct 14th. I just feel like it was a kick in the gut, and it knocked the wind out of me. My motivation just fizzled away.

I'm really disappointed and sad to make this decision to quit. I really wanted to make it as a derby girl, but I just don't have the will to go on anymore. Maybe I'll change my mind and come back and try out later, but I'm just not making any promises to myself.

I thank CRG for the fantastic opportunity to train with them all year. I have an immense amount of respect for everyone that bleeds for CRG. What this league has
accomplished is nothing short of amazing. I'm proud to have been a CRG and I'm proud that Raleigh has such a cool roller derby team.

Take care, y'all. I'll be seeing you later.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Eomer Phillips. ~1998 to November 6, 2006

Our sweet, sweet ferret Eomer left this world on Monday. Earlier this year, he was diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure and has been on meds ever since to slow the progression of the disease as well as to help rid his body of the fluid build up that resulted. Even though the surgery several months ago to remove part of his pancreas was successful (in that he no longer exhibited symptoms of insulinoma), there was just no way to remove all of the cancer. Three weekends ago, he suddenly went downhill on Saturday and had terrible diarrhea. We spent the weekend washing bedding, cleaning him up, and giving him subcutaneous fluids. On Monday, he saw the vet, and his blood work told us that he was suffering from kidney disease and the cancer (that caused his insulinoma earlier this year) had spread to his liver. The meds helped the diarrhea, but he just never got back to 100%. He tired very easily, and we began to wonder if he was in pain. This past Monday morning, his little heart was beating as hard as it could, but it just couldn't keep up with the demands of his body. His chest was heaving, and it was clearly apparent that it was time for Eomer to move on from this world.

Our fantastic vet, Dr Deresienski (Dr D) and the staff of Bowman Hospital fell in love with Eomer over the months so he got lots of love in his last minutes. Needless to say, it was an excruciatingly painful decision to make, but the right one. Eomer is the last of the Phillips Ferts, at least for a while … Serena, Gandalf, Max, Theoden, Cleopatra aka "Baby Girl" all went before. They each touched our lives in different ways.

Eomer and his brother Theoden came to us in January of 2004 through the Ferret Guardian Rescue Haven of Statesville at a Triangle Ferret Lovers Meeting (TriFL). They had been living in a cage on a balcony in Durham, and the names listed on the Durham shelter's paperwork were "Momma" and "Baby". The boys were both sick with shelter shock when we first got them...Theoden more so than Eomer...so we decided to name them after King Theoden and Eomer of LOTR.

Eomer was quite an ambassador for ferrets. Always gentle & loving, he charmed people wherever he went. He worked the NC Renaissance Faire two years in a row helping TriFL to educate the public about ferty-ferts, and he also volunteered his time during a TriFL visit to the NCSU Vet School allowing himself to be handled and examined by students in need of exposure to exotic animals.

Eomer was a simple guy. He loved to do his daily rounds when he got out of the cage. He had a route that he took through each room to make sure everything was in place and to see if anything new had appeared. Then, he'd burrow into his favorite afghan in the corner and dream sweet ferret dreams. He gave wonderful kisses and even snuck a few on his ornery old sister. Quite a Houdini in his early days with us in the Cary house, he discovered a secret way to get in his dad's desk cabinet which baffled us for days. He also figured out how to climb the desk chairs to reach the desktop frontier that he was so eager to explore. It was during one of his desk expeditions that he had his first taste of Pepsi after knocking his dad's can over and landed himself in the kitchen sink for a bath. A lover of the outdoors, he enjoyed getting dirt all over himself digging holes and exploring the yard on the occasions that he was allowed out. Eomer was a fierce little guy when he needed to be...the vacuum cleaner never stood a chance.

We miss Eomer terribly, but we are comforted by the fact that he is out of pain and reunited with his bro Theo-Theo & Baby Girl. We also laugh at the thought of his meeting Max, the most mischievous of our ferrets, and we wonder what Max is teaching him to do (tear up carpets, nip ankles, show his fangs, etc.). Whatever they are doing, the six Phillips ferrets were special little folks, and we miss each one.

Eomer was in our lives for only 2 years and 10 months. It's amazing how somebody that doesn't weigh 2 pounds can have such a huge impact on your life. Eomer's love was unconditional, and we will miss our Bunky Bunk terribly.

Monday, November 06, 2006

About lunch time today, Andrew & I had to take Eomer to the vet for Dr D to help him cross over. His little heart was fighting to keep beating, but he was struggling for his every breath. We knew that it was time. Eomer was the last of our 6 ferrets. He was a special little guy.